Tuesday, October 30, 2012

A Vision Coming to Light

Sometime in 2002, I think, I was camping in Washington state and we were near a river, in the mountains.  I was with a bunch of people that made some flash boil tea.  It gave me a mild high.  I thought that, for what we used, it should have been a stronger tea.  So upon returning from our hike, I asked if anyone was going to finish the mushrooms.  No one had an interest, so I started mowin down.  I didn't quite realize how much I had ate until I was almost through and came to the understanding I had probably eaten about 1/3 of an oz.  Little did I know, I would survive. 

That night I had a vision of a being in the sky hovering above me and the sense of being protected or care for.  It was an amazing trip that also had it's many concerns, as I had difficulty staying upright and had little to no mobility of my limbs thereby producing an effect that left me falling face first in the dirt on a constant basis, each time hitting my head into the ground.  My homies were concerned that I had concussed myself and one particular person volunteered to hang out with me to keep me awake in the event that I actually had.  The weekend move forward and life moved on.

Some years later, I sobered up and went back to school.  While doing some research for a paper, that night came back into reflection and I thought I would google some keywords that represented the vision I had during that trip.  I knew that the image did not reflect my childhood faith and that it slightly resembled what little I knew of eastern deities, at the time.  I clicked on images and proceeded to type "eastern god(dess)", "Buddha", "Hindu figures", and a few others that escape me at this time.  I remember searching diligently for "the right image" as there were many that could have passed but none that I was coming across as exactly what I saw.  Then...there it was, exactly as the image had presented itself to me among the mountains and along side of the river during a starlit night with a full moon along side of the summer days sun glaring bright from the weekend.  Are you kidding me?  

There were several images under the same name but this image fit the vision of that night to an exact fit.  I was beside myself; simply amazed.  I had no consciously known knowledge of this before that night.  As I dug deeper in to the lore of this being, she is said to be a protector.  Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce to you the Green Tara...




Sunday, October 28, 2012

A quote by Lily...

"Why is it that when we talk to God we're said to be praying, but when God talks to us we we're schizophrenic?"

PvP

The sound of silence can be so
fucking loud;
daunting and riddled with
anxiety.
How would I actually describe the sound
of the voices in my head
when it's perceived as regular activity?
Are they just thoughts perceived as voices?
Or are they voices masking themselves as thoughts?
Perception against perception
No wrong answers, just answers,
even if they are formed into questions.
There is no insanity.
There is no crazy.
There is just this
and what I choose to do with it.
There is here.
There is now.
And even that can be misleading.
What I think, what I feel, and what I see
is not who I am,
or what is actual. 
Nothing remains as it is.
Everything is in constant movement
constantly changing
never standing still
even when I think it is
feel like it is
or see that it is;
It is not what it claims to be.
No matter what IT is.

Friday, October 19, 2012

Hang in there...

new blog, new profile, a lot of work to be done before this thing gets up and moving, plus I've got a lot of other work I'm in the middle of...please find patience.  thank you